Frumpy Mummy

Sometimes I look in the mirror (the picture is not me looking in a mirror, just in case you were wondering) and think, what happened? Where’s my style gone?

When I was younger I had quite a strong sense of style. When I could afford my own clothes as a teenager I was a bit of a hippy. Late teens to early 20’s I just wore black. Early to mid-twenties I was retro/geek chic. Somewhere around late twenties when I started a proper job, and I earnt a bit of money, I started to follow trends. I’d buy cheap fashionable clothes, that I think I got away with, and lost my own sense of style. This became worse after I had my son when my weight was all over the place and comfort was placed way above style.

Now at 40 I’m starting to take an interest in looking good again! Just for me to feel confident in myself. But I’m a bit lost. I’ve been doing the same make-up for 10 years and essentially clinging to my jeans as though my life depended on them.

Looking back at my style I think my favourite period was my geek chic phase. I also like the 1940’s and 1950’s style. I can’t afford to throw out all my clothes and start again but I’m going to try and remember this when buying any new clothes. I’m not going for a sudden transformation but a phasing out of clothes that don’t fit very well and are not very flattering. First of all I need a big clear out to actually see what I have, then I need to take the time to put an outfit together properly rather than picking random things, that don’t need to be ironed, before I head out in the morning.

I’ve told myself I can’t buy any new clothes until I have a new job. Not only because of the lack of income but also the type of job I get will influence any new clothes I’ll be buying.

I have to be realistic, although I love 1950’s dresses and pencil skirts I am not a dress person! I live in jeans. But I do want to smarten up my look, add a few signature pieces and most of all wear clothes that flatter my figure.

I’m off to check on Instagram what 40 year olds are wearing nowadays!

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40, redundant woman with child care responsibilities, seeks part time, well paid, term time only job!

I’ve been in my current job for 8 and half years and it has certainly had its ups and downs. I always planned to move on after the second baby but the second baby never came and when I was able to take flexible working when the little one went to school last year, I thought why change the status quo?

Fast forward a few months and I’m being made redundant! Instant panic set in when I heard the news. 40 and redundant what on earth am I going to do? I’ve had a few months to think about it now and I’ve calmed down.

The obvious choices are get another part time office job, 3 or 4 days a week, or try to get an office job in a school. These are the types of jobs I have experience of, I’m skilled in and which would fit in with home life. However, the idea doesn’t really fill me with joy.

What if there is another way? A creative self-employed option? A work from home option? That is the dream of so many parents.

My dad said he thought it was funny I worked in an office as when I was younger I’d said it was something I’d never do. And certainly the start of my career wasn’t going in that direction. I completed a theatre degree and wanted to be an actor. After a couple of years of rejections, and badly paid jobs to pay the bills, I realised that although I loved acting I didn’t like the lifestyle and I wanted a family and a house.

I started doing drama workshops and almost went into teaching but segued into arts admin instead. I don’t know what made me make that choice at that time. Looking back, I should have gone into a behind the scenes theatre role. But I started an arts admin career. We managed to buy a flat and then a house and have a baby. And everything is plodding along quite nicely until you get made redundant and you realise you really don’t want another office job.

Taking inspiration from my mum, who retrained as an upholsterer at 40, I’m looking for something new. Or possibly, looking back to childhood dreams, something old. With the possibility of working for another 25 years looming ahead of me I need something to pay the bills, fit in with family and to possibly enjoy!

The risk adverse side of me wants to get a part time job as soon as possible and build a new business on the side. I think this is a positive way to start. But it will be hard to find the energy and the head space to learn a new skill and/or develop a business. I am going to give myself a couple of months, after looking after The Boy for the 6 weeks holiday, to find a part time job that I will enjoy. A new environment, and possibly sector, will provide new challenges. I will try and focus in on what my new enterprise could be in the next 6 months, as I don’t know where to start, and next year I want to be working towards something new.

The next 6 months are going to be interesting.

Life Begins and 40 (maybe)

It keeps happening, I can’t seem to stop it. I just keep getting older and older! Turning 40 is …interesting. I’m quite a level-headed person and know that age is just a number but for some reason the big 4-0 has been making me look at my life… a lot.

Physically I feel about 50 and look like I’ve not seen a mirror for 5 years, coincidentally the age of my boisterous little boy. Mentally I feel drained and like I don’t have a minute to remember who I am.

However, turning 40 has somehow made me more focused. First about how I wanted to celebrate my birthday but also about going through certain areas of my life and making some changes. Career, appearance, family, they could all do with an overhaul. I’m sure I’ll be writing blogs on all those things in the near future.

For my Birthday I planned the whole day, starting with a day of work and a lie in! After dropping the little one off at school we went for pancakes then went into town for a few hours of board games at a games café. Then we went to a nice burger place before picking up the boy for a party tea. We even managed to squeeze in a movie before bed.

I have decided I am actually going to celebrate all year round. So far I’ve visited family for afternoon tea, seen Mamma Mia with a good friend, been to the cinema on my own and spent a weekend in Bruges. I’ve been out more times this year than the past 5 years, which is why my life needs a bit of a make-over, but I’m feeling quite positive that a few tweaks to my life will make all the difference and a happier mummy can only make a happier family.

Back on the blog

After a long hiatus I’m back on the blog!

The original aim of this blog was to highlight some of the cool things do in London with a family. When I returned to work full-time it got harder and harder to find time to write the blog but also to go out doing cool stuff when all my boy wants to do is look at trains and go on the tube!

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The boy is coming up to five and things have settled down a little now he’s in school. We’re in a very good routine and I’m managing to carve out a little time for myself – it’s only taken 5 years! So, I decided to start the blog again.

I’ve given the site a make-over and this time my focus has shifted. I’m not sure I’d call this a Lifestyle blog, as I’m seriously lacking in the style department, but it is a life blog. I’ll be looking at the family finances, getting crafty and overhauling my frumpy-mummy image.

The older I get the more I find life worrying and overwhelming so I’m using this blog as an open diary where I can share my general anxiety disorder. But if that sounds too serious don’t worry, I’ve not lost my sense of humour so I’m hoping there will be plenty of laughs along the way.

 

How to enjoy London without leaving the sofa

tv remoteWhat a week I’ve had, I’m so glad it is the weekend. Unfortunately I won’t be getting creative this weekend as, after a major setback, we’re back to looking around houses in our spare time. Not what you want to be doing after a full week at work, I want to spend the weekend with my feet up on the sofa. Which got me thinking, can I appreciate all London has to offer without actually leaving our flat?
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Bonjour Mes Amis

dandelionAfter my first full week back at work I’m pooped. I’m not sure I’ll be up to anything creative this weekend however I do have to make seven party bags for one year olds without falling foul of a circle of yummy mummies, so a certain amount of creative thinking will be involved!
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